As you can imagine, I did have to explain why my phone and keys were being dropped off to me in the morning. It just so happened it was not Benjamin that I had to tell the story to. Brianne was the one who told me Benjamin was at home nursing a hangover while we were sitting in the dining room having a coffee. Last night, while I was walking home, Benjamin kept on drinking. The first question I got was more of a remark than a question actually, “Am I crazy to walk home, why would I not ask for a ride?” What can I say I am the type of crazy that would go to a bonfire in December while there is a snow storm going on! True story I am telling you! You are not a true Canadian until you have a fire in the snow! The next thing I had to answer was, “what do I have against my phone! Why do I keep on forgetting about it?” For this answer, it was half joking and the other half not so much so. The phone is smaller than a book and is just as dense as a short novel, easy to lose. The second reason, always early in the morning it is going off. There are other times during the day it is going off. Sometimes it is Peter or Crystal calling to see how I am doing. There is no reason for the phone to go off in the early hours of the morning.
Brianne asked to see if she could see my phone … she was going to set my phone up so that I would only hear the thing go off at certain times. The earliest that anyone would call me is seven in the morning, and the latest is ten at night. Brianne told me that I have three unread messages and messages that had gone to my answering service. Brianne started to laugh at me, I know I had that dumb ass look on my face. She was like, “you do not know how your phone works do you!” And I was like “nope, I handed the toy over to Crystal so she could play with for a couple of hours or so.” We took our drinks outside so that I could have a smoke. The font size was enlarged to the max, with a great deal of effort I was able to see what the three messages said.
All from an unknown source, the first message was a blank screen. The second was a “die!” The third was a little more creepy, “I .. see .. you .. fire!” I asked Brianne if by any chance did Benjamin see the messages. Brianne swears up and down that Benjamin would not do a thing like that. Then we listened to the answering service messages. Which by the way were on speaker, several messages were crackling with no words that could be understandable. The two that stuck out were “die” being repeated over several times and “I see you … fire!” Brianne asked me how many times do things like this happen.
I just shook my head back and forth, lite a cigarette and continued to move my head back and forth. “I remember the first time this happened to me. It was my first year in college, I was 19. I was getting ready for my last and final exams. I knew that I was going to ace the test, I knew everything I needed to know plus more. I already had 86 percent in the class. I was young, invincible and ready to take on the world. Everything was going my way, and nothing was bothering me but boys wanting to get in my pants.” I chuckled as I told Brianne my story. “For over a year nearing two, things were silent. I thought that they had finally gotten bored with me and moved on.”
I exhaled the smoke from my lungs … “That was not the case! That time was quiet before the big storm. It started off with small bruising on my legs and arms. Easy to explain, I sleep on my side with my hands between my legs. It was my fingers that gave me the bruises. The keys to my place would go missing. So I would leave without locking the door, just to return later and find them on the floor in front of the door. By the time I was writing my finals, it was every night all night long. I would wake up, and my computer would be on. Random letters had been typed on the computer screen. No words were distinguishable, but if you stood away from the computer like across the room away, it would look like the shape of eyes where on the screen. And the computer would be situated that the eyes would be watching me. After months of nagging by my boyfriend, at the time, he had convinced me to get a cell phone. Every time I would try to make a call out, all I would get is static. Took the phone back to get a new one, I would get phone calls in the middle of the night. I tried to explain things to the boyfriend at the time, he took it as I was stressed and tired from all of the studying and assignments I had just finished. Until one night he stayed over for the night! The phone went off, over and over. The last time he yelled, the biggest mistake he could have ever done. While he was sleeping, he had been yanked off the bed … he never spent another night at my place again. A few months later, he died! The coroner said he died of heart failure, though he was healthy and strong. I knew what really had happened. The parasites told me that I would regret not doing as I was told. The girl that was ready to take on the world had been put into her place!”
One thing that Brianne and I can relate to, we both know how it feels to have someone taken away from us. Knowing that the cause was the entities and not a damn thing we could do at the time. Rage filled my body, I did not ask for this. I did not want this type of life, I miss the girl I was, strong, determined and just full of life.
At the time I was not ready to fight, I did not want to be involved in a war that I had no idea why it was going on. Now! After they cut my arms up, I am past pissed off! I just do not know what I am going to do? I gave Brianne a half grin … I actually thought I was going to cry. I had buried things so well … the walls that I had controlled everything! Move one brick, and things can change … everything that I have felt came rushing at me! Blame … I attacked myself, the entities and everyone in general.
We all have something that we hold on, that it causes us to feel guilt. The thing is, there was nothing I could do to change the outcome of the event! If it was now, I might be able to do something. Then I was a child in an adult body, what I thought I knew, I learned this was not the case! After a while of me smoking and both of us finishing our drink, Brianne asked me to come back to her place. I thought about it … “You are not a councillor any more and nor do you need a lost puppy to look after! Things are only going to get worse before they get better.” I was getting ready to go back into the diner when Brianne told me that she firmly believed I should come back to her place. That there was something in her gut that told her that I should be there. Brianne did not want me there as a patient or client, but as someone that is a friend!
Getting to Brianne’s house I saw a lady in a brown dress, I would say 1900’s style. This lady was moving around the kitchen, I got the feeling that she was trying to cook or bake, something like that! I saw at one point this lady going to a container, she put her hand in the container. Looked at me and pulled out dollar bills. I think this lady was joking around when she said that men will never go into the kitchen to look for money. I smiled, thinking I would never have thought to look for money in the sugar jar. It was Brianne’s voice that brought me back to earth. Asking me if I would like a coffee!
Already Lauren, Savanna, Mathew, Cleo, and Brianne were there, sitting in the living room. I had an idea of what was going on. Just for clarification, I had asked, which everyone looked at Brianne, waiting for her to say something. Handing me a cup of coffee, Brianne sat in the next available seat. Her aura was off, I know something had gotten to her. By nature, she is a strong person inwards and out. It was Savanna that spoke up.
Savanna told us of her dream that she had Friday night. When she woke up, she told her mother about the dream. Something all in black stood across a road from her. Saying that he could see her at the fire. Hissing at Savanna to die. Savanna and her family were going on with the morning routine, getting ready to leave the hotel room, Lauren picked up her phone to look and see if there were any messages. In a message, she received the same thing words that had been spoken to her daughter.
Allison spoke up and said that she had a dream, just like Savanna. That is when everyone nodded their heads, saying something similar happened to them.
Jullian came running through the front doors apologizing for being late. After taking off his shoes and grabbing his coffee, he joined us. He looked at the group of us and started off to tell us all that the information that he has is not useful. The Zeragill had been watching everyone that was around the Friday night fire. Because of me, now they are going after all of us. It is only an idea, but Jazzgoth believes that the Zeragill thinks I am gathering a group of friends to start a rebellion. Jullian then looked at me. The information the Jazzgoth got was the Zeragill has claims on me. This was not the first time that they have done something like this. Jullian was like “does the name Jason Doring mean anything to you, Zita?”
I said nothing at all while everyone was talking, what was I to say! I allowed my body to remain calm, inside my blood was boiling. The more they were speaking the rage was getting higher and higher. The cup fell out of my hands when I heard Jason Doring. The Zeragills were not joking, they have killed before and will have no issues of doing so again.
I picked up the cup off the floor as someone went to the kitchen to get a towel to clean up the mess that I made. Whispering under my breath “sons of bitches, they are going to kill again!” As I was whispering this, I was thinking, ‘I will not let them take over my life! I will not do what they want! I refuse to give in to them!’ Jullian was like, “the Zeragills killed him!” I lost my temper with one sentence that came out of Jullian’s mouth. I glared at him with oh so much dislike! “Do you think I want to live like this?” Jullian stared at me, waiting for me to say more. “Do you think I want to live in fear? Always looking over my shoulders … waiting for the next attack? For someone that teaches demonology and witchcraft, you are very ignorant!” I slowly brought my tone down by this point. Trying to make myself as calm as possible. “The fact of the matter, it only takes one random person off the streets to strike up a conversation with me, and they are the next target! Do you think I was joking when I was talking about the Zeragills? I was not! They are not like anything that anyone has dealt with before, and I am their biggest target! It seems like Jazzgoth was correct when he said I was in more danger than I had thought!”
Allison remarked that it would be easier to help me if they knew the motive of the Zeragills actions. For a second, I got a shiver down and up my spine. Jullian’s vocal cords changed. Jazzgoth spoke up, informing me and everyone else. It is who I was in the past, the Zaragills cannot afford for me to remember and become the person again. Jazzgoth told the others that my history is bloody. Directly or indirectly, there is blood all around me. The word is my bloodline is in riched, which meant I was very old. It was in everyone’s best interest to stay away. I piped and said, “that a smart person would do exactly that, the Zeragals will go at any length to keep me isolated. Accidents happen all the time, they know how to make them happen.”
The chatter continued as I turned to leave the house, Jullian was close behind me. When Jullian grasped my arm, I could hear Jazzgoth in my head, “Look over your journals again, everything you need to know, is locked up in the dark. The Zeragills are not as strong as you are made to believe. Here are the facts that I know about you, Zita … No one would mention where your bloodline started, that information he could not gather. It is well known that the high council would love to get their hands on me. The word is that with my strength, that it could power one crystalline. Sustaining them for a century or more. Problem is Zita, you will not do what they are wanting! No matter how they approach you! The only way that they could get to you is if I a willing participant! The high council … they are scared of you, Zita use this to your advantage and seek council with the Akkadian’s. It is true that they can be aggressive in behaviour, but they will most likely be your best ally!” I thought about everything that was being said. I studied Jullian for a moment, thinking about the right words to say the right words. “Pretty much I was a wanted female, not much is known me. All sides know I am a pain, with a unique, strong will! Did I miss anything?” Jullian shook his head back and forth with a “nope” coming out of his mouth. Choosing my next sentence was slightly important. “So pretty much the only defence that I have is no one knowing who I am and what I am?” There was a long “yes” come out of Jullian’s mouth followed with “and possibly the Akkadian’s!”
Then I thought about my dreams … to reread or not to reread, that is the question. A cigarette had never tasted so sweet yet bitter at the same time.
Rate now I was in a bottomless dark pit. No way out! The reality was coming at me with no mercy, the tunnel had no light at the end, just more bull shit for me to deal with. I always felt like I was alone, hearing it, it was like a slap across the face. A way to say wake the fuck up! If I wanted to change, there was going to be no one to help me, I would have to make my own way. I guess this is something I always knew, in the back of my head, it was always there. I guess that I had always hoped in a way there would be something out there for me. I just had not found it and just had to wait my turn. All of the negative thoughts I had thought was the truth. Hope is just a wish! A wish is nothing but hope. Neither could I work with. The only thing that I could do is work with what I have and continue to move. At this point, I was moving only in a circle, moving nowhere! I asked Jazzgoth if I had known the location of the Bayairs would that get the Zeragill off everyone’s back?” Jazzgoth told me that he would have to get back to me as soon as he has an answer. I threw my butt on the gravel and strolled back to the house. Everyone was talking, once they saw me, the room went silent. I made the assumption they had been talking about me.
I asked Brianne to open the store to get a few more items. I placed the stones at all entrances that had the potential of being entered. If anything, this would add more protection to everyone in the house. Soon the property would have to be looked after. This would attract more of their attention, but no harm would come of the property. The last thing I did was placing a stone in each car that was on the lot, this should allow the driver safety from an unseen entity. Was I going overboard on the whole protection … I think not! Investigating the plot of land one more time, I upped the security here as well. Pretty much instead of a 10-volt protection system, I upgrade it to 100 volts. I told Jullian that as of now, Jazzgoth would not be able to come onto the property, if he has any ill will towards any flesh and bone creatures. I did not feel the need to explain the reason for my actions nor request. Jullian asked me who I was? “I am a sister, daughter, love, hater, victim, survivor, fighter and protector. Most of all rate now, I am pissed off! That is who and what I am!”
It was Brianne that gave me a ride back to the hotel, I told her that I would not be going over for some time. Brianne said to me that she expected me over for dinner tomorrow. I laughed and told her she just might be as stubborn as I am. Her reasoning for me coming back was to see if what I did was working! I told Brianne to give Ash a call and see if what I did there worked. It was her turn to laugh and say that she might have found her competition. We could agree on one thing, we both were stubborn. Brianne just wanted to make sure that I was going to be okay. I understood what she is getting at.
I told Brianne I was too angry to give in or give up! What I wanted out of her was the real reason she wanted me at her place, besides a drama show in live action? Brianne did not have a dream of a black shadow or anything else. Her friends had called her one at a time with the same story. It was a dream of her lover that got away, telling her to get me back to the house, that I was in danger. Hearing my messages and her lover’s message, she went with her gut. I gave her a forced smile and told Brianne she was too late. I told her about the meeting with the crazy queen.
Brianne got into the hotel parking lot and asked me for a cigarette! Told me she quit years ago, with everything going on, she needed one. Told Brianne that I would have stopped several times if it were not for all the attacks. It is like a calming blanket. When they are gone, and I am alone, I do not touch the damn things. Things get rough, and I need a way to calm down. That is when Brianne asked me if I had tried marijuana? That is one thing I had not tried, actually kind of scared of it. I heard that it mellows you out and calms you down. I am more afraid that I would be more susceptible to an attack on the use of marijuana.
Brianne did agree with me at the same time pointed out that it could also help me a great deal to, in small dosage. Stepping outside of the car, I handed Brianne a smoke and lite one for myself. She asked me how were things here? Physically, I was fine, nothing wrong with me at all. Mentally things are only getting worse, and my temper is just rising higher. That is what I do not want to happen. People make mistakes when they are angry. Brianne asked me if I had any hobbies or anything I enjoyed doing?
One of my favourite things to do is go for long walks. It is time I can jump out of my reality and enjoy what is around me. Other than that, I do not do much, just keep to myself. She asked me about work? Something to keep me going. For that rate now I had nothing to do, the last project was completed roughly a month ago. I did not have the chance to see if there was something for me to do. My contacts probable thought I have dropped off the side of the world. Which that is what it feels like. Peter was to give them a message that I was in the hospital. When things got better, I would send them a message. It was not money that I was worried about, it was getting through this in one piece that has me concerned. Things have not been this bad since my early twenties. It is a repeat of hell all over again. I started to laugh when I said, “history has a habit of repeating itself. If the first time it did not work, what made them think the second time things would be any different?”
Brianne was serious when she asked me if things will be different this time for me. For me, it had been on the back burner, I just had not decided it because I did not want to purposefully hurt this woman with my words. But it had to be said. I was not like her friend, death is not a safe place for me. And it is not my way out other. The other side or here it is, all the same, I will only be running. It just feels a wee bit safer here versus there. Brianne dropped her butt on the ground and twisted her shoe over top of the remaining cigarette. I was glad that she was not hurt by my words. Actually, she was relieved. Getting back into the car Brianne told me that dinner was at six if I were not there Brianne would send Benjamin to get me. I laughed when I mentioned she does not like to hear the word no! Rolling down the window, Brianne told me that no … can not, anything said along that line is not in her dictionary. Considering the situation I was in, Brianne was not going to let me off the hook that easily. To make sure that nothing is going to happen to me, it brings her peace of mind to keep an eye on me. I can see why Peter is the same way. It is just a part of their nature!